I've mentioned before that there's nothing worse than a Smashing Pumpkins concert, but I think it needs mentioning again. They hate you and you end up hating them and then they storm off all pouty.

What other bands aren't worth your (ever increasing) buck? Who sucks?

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Answers

I used to be in the music business (about a million years ago - when I was Pamie's age). Back then, in the "Totally Superficial 80's", the evil monolith which generated my paycheck also provided me with the opportunity to see any concert for free, as long as it was on one of their labels.

Just to give you guys some perspective, the hot acts I pimped for the evil monolith included: Bruce Springsteen (huge), George Michael (gargantuan), Michael Jackson (remember it was the 80's - people were not so clued in to the fact that he was a young-boy-loving freak and he sold trillions of albums), Europe (does anybody remember them? At the time I was instructed to tell people that they were the greatest heavy metal pop band of all time. Hmmm. Guess not.), Michael Bolton (he had hair then)

Needless to say, I endured a multitude of horrible concert experiences, aggravated by the fact that I had to look people in the eye and tell them how fabulous each and every one of our acts were. With a straight face.

Anyway, my absolute worst concert experience ever ocurred during this time in my life.

The evil monolith hosted a yearly gathering of employees from around the world. The purpose of this event, in my opinion, was to give the senior executives an opportunity to snort coke off of strippers implants while simultaneously stabbing and patting each other on the back. The rest of us were invited to cover their tracks.

The first year that I attended, they flew us all to an exclusive resort in Boac Raton, Florida for 4 days. Over the course of our stay we were "treated" to performances by almost every artist on the labels. Some of them were good, some were so-so and some were...well...New Kids On The Block.

NKOTB were just hitting it big. I had long outgrown the teenybopper years and I was actively uninterested. Because they were being touted as the greatest thing since the Beatles (God, can you imagine?), and because the president of the company had a hard-on for them (when he wasn't chasing stripper tail) each and every employee of the company was forced to witness one of the most embarassing and pathetic...uh...performances of all time.

Picture this: These kids walk out on the stage. No instruments of any kind, just a boombox. I think the idea was that they were supposed to seduce the crowd with their smarmy boy-toy charms, but something went horribly wrong. First of all, they all looked like they'd been partying in the stripper suite for at least a couple of days. Second, their boombox didn't work.

Now, these bands out of Orlando like the Backstreet Boys or N'Sync - I think those guys can actually sing...or at least carry a tune. It became frighteningly clear in a very short period of time that NKOTB were not so lucky. There was much fumbling of the boombox and gnashing of teeth behind smiles and whatnot, then their manager came out on stage, got them in a huddle and started pushing them towards the edge of the stage. "Excellent" I thought to myself "He's going to kill them and I can get the fuck out of here".

Unfortunately, this was not the case. The boys shuffled to the edge of the stage and sat down. Some misguided fool handed them a microphone and for the next 30 minutes I, along with my 2000 coworkers, suffered through the most heinous torture one can endure. High notes, low notes, off-key harmonies, Peter Brady voice changing - it was horrible.

Obviously the boombox was the secret of their success. Whoever repaired it was a bloody moron.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

The first concert I ever attended was Bon Jovi. I was in the 8th grade. I got my ass grabbed by a long-haired neanderthal. I still haven't quite recovered. (From the music, not the ass grab.) The next day, I had "Bon Jovi" painted on my face at the school fair. The whole experience was tragic (these five words I swear to you).

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

The Promise Ring - ABSOLUTE CRAP AND THE WORST WASTE OF $7 IN MY ENTIRE LIFE EVER!!!! Why bother making happy pop-emo records when it's all studio tricks? I was SO disappointed when they came out and played like they all had diarrhea and had never used their instruments before. DORKS.

Every Fat Wreck band I've ever seen - NOFX, Millencolin, the list goes on. I didn't pay for most of these shows, but CHRIST ALMIGHTY I feel sorry for those that did and I want those couple hours of my life back.

Every noise/grindcore band I've ever seen. I am sorry, screaming into a microphone while your guitar and bass players randomly strum in front of their amps is NOT music no matter how much they may think it is.

Most of the bands @ Warped Tour 98, they know who they are. (Except Bad Religion because Greg Graffin & company can do no wrong!) Although I thought it was mighty cool that Rancid loaded their own equipment on and off the trucks instead of letting greasy pedophile roadies do it for them.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Back in college I went to see The Gin Blossoms (now the Gas Giants), and the Screaming Cheetah Wheelies opened for them, and oh boy did they SUCK!!!! Gin Blossoms were good though. The next year TMBG were at my college and Frank Black (?!?) opened for them, I still to this day dont know who he is. TMBG was great though, I got my John Henry CD signed!! I loved loved loved that song about the "The Sun" I cant remember what its called now. ah, senility. Or maybe it was the other way around and the opening bands were reversed. Im confused, collge was so long ago.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Dora!!!

My friends and I hated Bon Jovi with such a passion - we made up lewd hand signals to that song.

~I'll be there for you! These five words I swear to you!~

Stupid.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

The legendary Frank Black was a member of the greatest band of all time - The Pixies

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Thank you, Sarah, as I was coming here to say just the same. This was also right after I had just posted how sad I feel when someone asks who the Pixies are. Glad I have an example right here.

Worst concert-- every single Smashing Pumpkins. Really. I'll keep saying it.

Milla Jovovich (I know I'm butchering her name here) opened for Toad the Wet Sprocket. They had to tie her to the mic, the gal was so high.

10,000 Maniacs. Natalie bitched and moaned and bitched and moaned and was pissed about the Junebugs in Houston and she just stopped playing the piano in the middle of the song and said she wasn't going to play anymore if there were going to be bugs all flying around her. Bitch.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

ooooh. I had forgotten how much 10,000 Maniacs sucked.

I had a boyfriend who was friends with Natalie and dragged me to at least 6 or 7 of her shows. Man that was horrible. And if you think her stage persona is bad - believe me, it doesn't get any better in her real life.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

let me just add my name to the list of people in dismay over the fact that that poor soul didn't know who frank black was. and in pamie's forum, of all places to mention it.

tsk, tsk.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Public Image Ltd. at the Greatest American Music Hall, after they went in for thrash. BLEAH. We left.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

I've seen some pretty bad ones, but the most recent bad show had to be the Donnas. They're pretty, alright, but god they sucked!

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

slipknot.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Oh my god, Sarah. You promoted Europe? I LOVED EUROPE. "The Final Countdown" "Carrie"- I loved this band. I'm so excited about this.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Word on the evil that is 10,000 Maniacs. I was at the same show and to this day I hate, hate, HATE Natalie Merchant with a vengance for her totally bitchy attitude. I was forced to sit through her at Lilith Fair a couple of years ago which just increased my venom. Will someone please teach this woman how to dance?

Second to that, I'll have to go with the Spin Doctors about three years after they peaked with "Two Princes" (if you can call that song peaking that is). I was living in Lubbock and starved for entertainment of any kind, but damn, did they suck. We were at the show for an hour and they had played 4, count 'em, 4 songs. Apparently a 15 minute version of "Little Miss Can't Be Wrong" was their idea of "rocking out" or something. That, and the lead singer kept doing these scary karate kick-type things toward the audience. It was like an episode of "When One Hit Wonders Go Bad" or something.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Greenday, at Wollongong Uni, 1998. Don't get me wrong, ordinarily I think they're okay (I know many who disagree with me on that, but I'm not going there). However, put me in a concert hall where it's an all ages gig and suddenly 12 becomes the average age, then you have problems. Then add to the mix the band who, not surprisingly, felt that they had to angle their concert to this pre-pubescent mix and then you officially have The Concert From Hell.

The most startling memory from that night when I convinced my boyfriend to try and get into the music. We walked into the 'mosh pit' (note: walked), stridding easily into the centre of it and looked around, which was easy to do because we were taller than everyone else - and I'm usually considered short. If we had moshed in there we would hurt them. It was tempting in a way, but I have to say this was the only concert I've ever walked out on before it had finished.

I agree that seating at concerts is wrong, wrong, wrong. Although on saying that I would see the Foo Fights and Chilli peppers together no matter what the conditions.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Bon Jovi. No contest. It was the slippery when wet tour. It was lame. The had that walkway and shit that let them walk out above the crowd. They had pyrotechnics and they had my money. To this day i have never understood how i let anyone convince me to go to that.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

I saw Haircut 100 open for Flock of Seagulls. *shiver*

How sad is that?

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

I was at the Foo/Red Hot concert last night and straight up, Pamie. That opening act was the worst thing I think I've ever seen. I only caught the last twenty minutes (Champagne Supernova kept me outside in the lobby). The guy said something like, "You wanna hear (lame ass guitarists' name that I can't remember) do 'Fake Plastic Trees?'" And I start yelling "woo hoo!" like an idiot, thinking it might be cool.

The guy can't sing it and play at the same time, so they play some REALLY lame song of their own. Oh, I wanted to cry. Thank God for Dave Grohl.

Close second: Seeing Third Eye Blind open for U2. I think it is deafness, not blindness, that is that band's chief disability.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

When I was in 8th grade, I saw New Kids on the Block. (yeah it was real bad)

"Cinderella" opened for ACDC back in '88. They sucked hard also. AC/DC on the other hand was as fun as you think it'd be. hee hee hee

I also paid money to see Fionna Apple on tour when she was promoting Tidal. She canceled the DC concert and never came back to DC until she had released "When the Pawn" That still PISSES me off. (yeah I got my money back but still . . . .)

I still can't believe someone didn't know who Frank Black was.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Please note: I grew up in metal land. In the 80's.

Thus, I was treated to an endless array of hair bands parading through my home town. The Scorpions (or, "the Scorps'" as the kids called 'em), Ratt, Bon Jovi, Warrant, Twisted Sister, Quiet Riot, Motley Crue, Poison, Def Leppard, Cinderella, Whitesnake (completely with writing Tawny Kitaen), April Wine, Nelson... name a bad one and they played my hometown. Often. Over and over.

Needless to say, we were starved for entertainment. Thus I can stand up before you and say, yes, I have seen Huey Lewis and the News sing "I Want a New Drug". I have seen Hall and Oates sing, "Modern Love" - with OXO singing "Whirly Girl" as an opener. And lo, I have seen REO Speedwagon sing "I Can't Fight This Feeling". And I live to tell about it.

-- Anonymous, May 03, 2000

Few really bad concerts stick out in my mind. I guess the worst one was back in the early eighties - a concert by the Chicago Symphony Orchestra with Lynn Harrell playing the Elgar Cello Concerto. Not really that bad, but his intonation was slightly off and his overuse of vibrato in some instances was beyond what many in attendance considered tasteful. A brooding and moody autumnal work, a cellist playing the Elgar concerto walks a fine line between heartfelt melancholy and maudlin kitsch that is easily crossed if he or she does not maintain self-discipline. The balance between orchestra and soloist (always difficult with solo cello) was also poor. Oh well - the CSO, especially under the baton of Sir Georg Solti, was never considered a great concerto orchestra. To be fair, the dry acoustics of Symphony Hall at the time was probably most instrumental in the problems of balance. Recent renovation and subsequent fine-tuning of the hall, while not up to high initial expectations, have improved matters. Plus, Baremboim is a damn fine conductor. But I digress...

I have to agree that any concert by the Smashing Pumpkins is crap. Thanks for mentioning that, pamie. Too bad you had to attend one of their concerts to figure that out. But it's not as if you hadn't been provided ample warning. They have released several albums.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

Never saw the Pumpkins but I've had the misfortune of hearing a much-hyped secret gig they played in Sydney a couple of years ago on radio. All I remember is the Billy Corgan doing the opening lines of "Ava Adore" and "Bullet With Butterfly Wings" (which started with this percussion break with about three drummers or something), gargling out the words in this strangulated monotone like he had no conception of what the tunes were supposed to be. Quite possibly he didn't. The rest of the show has been mercifully blotted from memory.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

The band that opened for the Dream Theater concert I went to last March was called the Star People
Oy.
Their stage schtick was this: apparently they are aliens, bringing us the music of the stars, or some bullshit like that. They were all of them wearing white dinner jackets and bow ties. The lead singer looked like an old, overweight Brad Majors. The other singer and exotic drum player (bongos, congas, etc), looked like an old Rocky Horror.
They had a good violinist, but it would have taken a hell of a lot more than that to save the band. (It would have taken a permanent MUTE, I think.)
Dream Thester really was good. But their opening act blew.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

Before reading all this I was gonna say - Timmy T. Heh. It was 1992, and he was gonna give a free concert to the school that collected the most pennies for charity, and our school won. I don't even remember any of his songs right now. I honestly didn't like the guy or that kind of music back then (or now really), but all my girlfriends were going.

But then I read "3rd Eye Blind opened for U2", and I remembered that on our leg of that tour, Smashmouth opened. It was amazing, because this was right after "Walking on the Sun" came out, and that was their only audience-friendly song. The rest of their stuff was ENTIRELY wanna-be punk. Except much worse.

So when "All Star" came out, I thought it was hilarious. I mean in case it wasn't obvious that they sold out when you heard that song in EVERY FREAKIN' MOVIE in the summer of 1999, the fact that all their new stuff is a single sounding just like "Walking on the Sun" when they were actually a wanna-be punk band solidifies it.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

I tend to walk out when a show happens to stink, but on a few occasions I stayed and watched, because sometimes a band is so bad you just have to have pity on them. The Smiths and the Pixies, for example. And I threw a glass of beer at the singer of Bauhaus once, but that was because he kept on shouting 'Sieg Heil' throughout the show.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

1982 or 3, Black Sabbath LIVE/EVIL Tour(post-Ronnie James Dio). Opening Band - Quiet Riot. Top that.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

Richard Marx at the Greater Gulf State Fair. He was an hour late to the stage because his jeans split in the ass and they had to sew them. I'm not kidding.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

in the category of bands who hate you: Hole. They played here (Twin Cities) as part of a festival concert last summer. I think they were up there for all of 2 songs before Courtney Love started throwing one of her patented tantrums. The sun was too hot, it was too early in the morning for her (it was 4 pm), we were all a bunch of *#$@$^#!@* and she was leaving. They walked off and the DJs from the radio station running the show spent the rest of the 2 day festival leading the crowd in "Courtney sucks cock"-esque chants between bands.

I'm with Pamie on the Smashing Pumpkins. They did a free show in the middle of downtown Minneapolis a few years ago and oh my god did that suck. They did one crappy rendition of "Bullet with Butterfly Wings" and then like 2 hours of stuff no one had ever heard before. feh.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

Marilyn Manson opened for Nine Inch Nails, this was before anyone knew who the hell he was. God, he was so bad, so bad. He invited the teenage boys in the audience to come up on stage and suck his "big rock star cock". He had this huge faux dick attached to some leather undies and he was pouring beer on it and shaking it at the crowd. He also pulled down his pants and poured beer down his crack into the audience. Truely vile. We were laughing hysterically at him and his "Fuck God!" rantings. I don't know what his shows are like now, but not only was the music bad, so were his antics.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

oddly, i saw that concert and loved the oddity that was marilyn. i never got to see gwar, and i felt like this was my closest experience.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

Alanis Morrissette at Wembley Arena. I should have known - the venue was crap, and so's her second album, which she insisted on singing. The only good bit was laughing at her dancing - she's a spastic, and no mistake.

Also a Cranberries concert at the same venue - for the same reasons as you outlined yesterday, Pamie. Some of the crowd had never heard of the first album, and all looked blank when Dolores started in on 'Linger'. I fear I may have been one of the oldest people there.

The entertainment factor was high though - lots of teenagers getting really excited about jumping around, and one completely gormless young man who was seemingly incapable of shutting his mouth - he just stared, slack-jawed, at the stage for the entire concert. I think it was the first time he'd been allowed out in public.

All in all I realised I'm too old to stand up at concerts, because people crashing into me just piss me off, and as I'm 5 foot 10 I always want to crash back, even though I could knock some of those girls to the floor. So instead I delight in standing directly in front of really short people, and then getting grumpy if they keep annoying me. Simple pleasures.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

I'm ashamed to even admit I was there, but Meredith Brooks, The New Daisy, Memphis. No way she writes her own music. It was like listening to the CD on random. I haven't been able to listen to the CD since. (which is probably not a bad thing)

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

Chumbwamba. It was an all ages show, and the woman with the blue hair (at least it was blue that week) wore a nun costume and kept grabbing herself and swearing. They were all political, and expected us to be, too. We were just there for the tunes, man.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

Oh, God.

Natalie Merchant opening for Sting about four years ago.

I will never, never, never have those moments of my life back. Never. She was appalling. In terrible voice and looking so bored and pissed off that she actually had to perform that I wanted to yank her off the stage in the stupid flowered dress she was wearing that made her ass look huge.

Actually, the fact that she looked like shit was the only thing that made seeing her worthwhile.

Ugh.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

I'm a sucker for live music, so someone has to be pretty bad for me to trash them...

...however, to echo the earlier comment on Courtney Love and Hole, she threw a legendary tantrum here at a concert in D.C. a few years ago. I think she lasted two songs, went off on the audience and left the stage.

The concert itself was great, since it was a festival show and there were lots of other bands. And I guess you have to figure that you always take your chances when you pay money to see Courtney Love.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

pamie, i was at the same 10,000 maniacs concert where natalie bitched. it was the summer of 93 at the woodlands pavilion. i remember she wouldn't stop wailing about the bugs and finally someone handed her some bugspray -- which she freaked about because it wasn't organic or some such shit. it was too bad, because i really dug her until then. when she came back for lilith fair in 98, she kept talking to this grasshopper on her dress the whole damn time. she's a freakshow.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

the lemonheads in orlando in '96. an up and coming local band named "matchbox 20" opened for them. there was a lot of pushing around and what not. evan was bored.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

Does anybody remember The Runaways? I saw them with Alice Cooper in about 1976, Alice was cool but The Runaways YIKES

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

Anyone remember Take 6? They were christian acapella group that I used to love before I found Satan. those guys can sing, but they put on a shitty show... My brother got his first contact high at an Aldo Nova concert...

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

OK, ok, I did the best, now the worst:

Jane's Addiction, 1998? Brandeis University, Waltham, MA. UGH! First of all the auditorium itself sucked. Some of the barriers fell down and they had to stop the show for almost an hour >> an hour that was filled with vague threats from the various concert-goers about burning the place down, etc. Then there was the show itself: GOD. Cage-dancers, lame-ass versions of the same old shit, Perry falling over, it was SO bad. I think it was all the worse because I had pretty high expectations and I was with a big group of total fans so I thought it would be good. I was wrong.

Honeymoon Suite, opening for Jethro Tull in some mega-stadium sometime in the late 80's. Is there a worse band on the planet than Honeymoon Suite? They had all the hair band poses that you can imagine, and none of the hair band musical chops. Extreme suckage.

Counting Crows, Pearl St., Northampton, MA, 1993. "Mr. Jones and Me" are leaving the building now. Or at least I am. Oh my God! Maybe it was because they were still a relatively new band, but I had FREE TICKETS to this (I managed a record store at the time and got frequent comps) and had to LEAVE. As did all of the people I went with. Stinkage. I still shudder.

The Ramones, sometime in the early 90's. Oh, I had such expectations. Oh, they were SO not met. I love every song they ever "wrote" -- excepting perhaps "Pet Semetary" -- but damn, they phoned in this performance. I think they probably were actually out back drinking and used some sort of CGI or something . . .

The Dead Milkmen, sometime in the early 90's, UMASS/Amherst. Again, love their stuff, hated them live. It partially wasn't their fault, the crowd was unutterably lame and filled with frat-boys who thought that moshing meant CRUSHING. Thankfully I am no shrinking violet and can crush with the best of them, but I don't think I've ever felt less safe at a concert.

And as always I'll vote for Smashing Pumpkins. I was "lucky" enough to see them when their first CD's came out in 1991. They were on tour with Pearl Jam (who also were just about to release their first big CD) and the Peppers. One of my customers at the record store told me that the Pumpkins were great and I'd love them; the first band came out on stage and they ROCKED. I thought they were the Pumpkins, so I was impressed. Second band came out and they sucked so bad that I almost left. Not looking at the audience, whining, missing cues, standing stock still with nothing playing, yelling at the audience -- everything bad. I thought they had to be this "Pearl Jam" -- it was only later that I found out the truth. Band one, PJ, band two (no mystery to anyone here) Pumpkins. UGH UGH UGH UGH. Kings of Suck.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

I saw the Barenaked Ladies this december and while the Ladies ROCKED, their opener Tal Bachman of 'HIIIIIIIIGH above me' fame sucked. we couldn't see him or hear him, he had no lighting and since we only knew one song of his, most of the audience just chanted for the main act.

-- Anonymous, May 04, 2000

Several people have complained about going to concerts and being the oldest people there... I think I'm about to be the oldest one to post on this forum, as you might be able to tell from the acts I'm about to name...

This may be hard for people to grasp, but I actually went to a Shaun Cassidy concert. My girlfriend and I were chaperoning my little sister and her friend. I'd have to say this was the Summer of 1979.

It was... an experience. Shaun was definitely past his peak as a teen idol and the place was less than half full, but the crowd was very enthusiastic. However, I nearly passed out when Shaun lept onstage wearing skin-tight purple satin pants.

He actually wasn't too bad. He rocked out much harder in person than he did on record (not that it would be difficult to do that) However, I was having just as much fun watching the crowd as watching the stage.

Probably the funniest moment was between one of the songs. Apparently it was the birthday of one of the members of Shaun's band, and this slinky looking woman strode out on stage to present him with a birthday cake.

It was the middle of the summer, but I swear the temperature of the auditorium dropped forty degrees. Another woman... onstage with Shaun!! Waves of hatred issued from the crowd. I thought there was going to be a riot. She quickly exited before the crowd got too mean.

When Shaun introduced the band, he mentioned that his keyboard player had been with Three Dog Night, which for those of you who weren't alive in 1972, were one of the hottest bands at the dawn of the 1970s. The poor keyboardist looked like he was fondly thinking about the bottle of gin waiting for him back stage.

However, the worst concert I've ever been to? That would have to be the Cars, sometime in the early eighties. I have never seen a band be so absolutely lifeless on stage. The played all their songs, note for note, just the same as they were on the records. They didn't interact with the audience at all, not even to say "thank you."

I remember reading an interview with Ric Ocasek some time after that where he was talking about doing "virtual concerts" and this was long before there even was an Internet. I thought: "Why broadcast your concerts live when you're NOT EVEN THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE???"

-- Anonymous, May 05, 2000

Once again, I'd like to thank the other ancients for posting, 'cause I just have to say this: not only do I not know who Fred Black is, I've never heard the Pixies. (Geez, did I even get the guy's name right? I'm getting so forgetful lately.)

The all-time worst attempt at music I've ever endured was Golden Earring, who opened for an Aerosmith concert in the late seventies. (I was not, how should I say this, fully present from 1977 to 1985, so I can't be too specific.) Golden Earring sucked mightily, and played Radar Love for a full thirty minutes. They were finally booed off the stage. Now, a stadium full of Aerosmith fans is not the most discerning group of musical snobs you're likely to meet,but Golden Earring BLEW. Aerosmith never showed up, either -- they claimed plane trouble, but I bet they were just too wasted. The poor guy who made the announcement got a Jack Daniels bottle (among other things) thrown at his head...

-- Anonymous, May 05, 2000

I saw Ministry at Lollapalooza in '93 and they were awful...but the worst band i've ever seen was Bitch and Animal, they opened for Ani Difranco in Atlanta last year. Oh my God, they were bad.

-- Anonymous, May 05, 2000

Ok, I think Dawn must have meant to post her Black Sabbath/Quiet Riot concert on the *best* concerts page. I saw Quiet Riot last summer at the Station in West Warwick and they still rock. Kinda.

Most of the "worst concert" experiences I can think of have as much to do (or more to do) with the crappy crowd than the bands. Except for when Lint tried to pick a fight with me in Tucson because I said I thought Rancid's press release was pompous and cheesy. That sucked. I hate fighting. Actually most of the really bad shows I can think of were really bad because somebody decided that they had to beat up somebody else at the show. That always ruins it for me. That's why I stopped seeing the Bosstones like a decade ago and stopped seeing the Dropkick Murphys after they stopped being the opening band for Showcase Showdown and started being the skinhead heros of Boston.

I think the worst band I ever saw was a band called Mushroomhead from Cleveland. They played at a bar in Pittsburgh that has alternately been called The Decade, Tobacco Road, Froggys, and The Next Decade. I'm not sure what it was at the time. They had a stripper and all the guys were going nuts for her which was a little creepy, and the more sumbissive she acted the crazier the crowd got, but when they had a song called "suck my cock" and she pulled out a strapon and tried to get guys to suck on it people seemed to get really uncomfortable. No guy wanted to even pretend to suck a penis. It was wierd and sad.

Oh yeah, and any show I've been to in the past two years probably ties for "worst concert." The local music scene in Providence is dominated by RISD students and ex-RISD students who all sort of mindlessly worship this gimicky noise/grind stuff that gets played at this local warehouse space called Fort Thunder. Most of the bands suck complete ass but it seems like the art students will still go nuts for them because.. well.. that's what you do.

I haven't seen a good show in Providence in years.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2000

Its a tie:

Cat Power and a now defunct band called Sabalon Glitz.

Do not go to see Cat Power. Really. You think she's gotten better, you think maybe she took guitar lessons, but she has terrible stage fright and you know, you'll just waste you 12-15 $. buy another of her mediocre cds that are only saved by the drummer. I'm sympathetic, but I just think she should only play for free if she's going to be so bad.

-- Anonymous, May 08, 2000

Ratt.

Need I say more?

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2000

When I was a senior in high school (1989), my boyfriend at the time dragged me to the "Club MTV Tour." The performers included Was not Was (the only tolerable act on the bill), Information Society, Paula Abdul, and the real kicker: MILLI VANILLI! And yes, they did do that running chest-bump thing.

-- Anonymous, May 09, 2000

Hahaha, "Was not was". Or was their name "Was (not was)"?

just last night at the bowling alley, in the middle of my roll I all of a sudden thought of "walk the dinosaur" and wondered "What the hell ever happened to 'Was (not was)'?"

I got a strike. I should do that more often.

It's creepy that I have neither heard nor heard of that band in a decade but I thought of it tonight and read about it today on the forum.

And when someone says "Ratt," again I know they meant to post that in the *best* concerts section. Right?

-- Anonymous, May 10, 2000

I, too, had the good fortune to see Milli Vanilli in concert before their big expose. You can hardly blame me, I was only 8. All I remember is having to pee really bad the whole time, being pissed off that I had to stand up in order to see, and being paranoid that someone was going to steal my purse (yes, it was stonewashed denim). To top it all off, it was my first concert EVER. Ahhh, memories.

-- Anonymous, May 10, 2000

The first band I ever saw was NELSON. Ok. I was in sixth grade, and my sister and I were in love with them. We had their video and their tape (cassettes!). My aunt's rich boyfriend got us tickets to their show at, like, Rosemont Horizons or something. We were so excited because, first of all, we got to go to Chicago for the weekend because of this show. Secondly, he'd gotten us third-row seats. And third, we got to go shopping for cool concert outfits. I remember very clearly that I bought a purple Hypercolor T-shirt and little hoop earrings with silver stick people hanging off of them. I thought I was the shit. Normally my mom did not believe in buying us "cool" clothes that the rest of the kids had. I don't really remember the concert itself, but I do remember sitting amongst many breasty, leather-clad bleach-blonde rock chicks who flung their panties at the stage.

-- Anonymous, May 11, 2000

Goo Goo Dolls.

A few friends and I went to the fairgrounds to see them. It was raining like mad all day long, so we were expecting to mosh in the mud, kinda like the crowd at Woodstock in front of Green Day.

The bastards stiffed us, citing lightning after a 45 minute wait as grounds for cancellation. Boo hoo. Cost us seven dollars on our refund.

-- Anonymous, May 12, 2000