Are there any family traits you are working to break?

For me, it's this tendency my family has of thinking that once you're out of the house, you're out of the family. We become strangers to each other. I don't want that for my kids... Tanya commented on that the other day, said "Promise me we won't be like that!" It was a promise I was glad to make, and it made me feel very warm that she felt the same.

-- Anonymous, June 17, 2000

Answers

For me, it's just the opposite. We always acted like we were happy with each other, and that home life 'wasn't that bad.' (My mother's quote.) Never mind the psychological/emotional/intellectual/sexual/physical abuse. Everybody still either denies it happened or rationalizes it. (And that's quite a trick.) I finally got tired of all the lies about six years ago and 'divorced' my family. Let them lie to each other if they want, but I won't be a part of it any more. The fact is, we always were strangers to each other. I'm just the only one to own up to the fact and live my life accordingly. On a more specific note, I found out recently that I inherited a temper, and that's a bad thing with my family history. I got mad at Ingrid over the stupidest little things, and even said some hurtful things. Definitely a family trait I can stand to lose.

-- Anonymous, June 17, 2000