Ha! Vindication! The clog thing isn't just me, is it. At last, proof. But I have a theory on the smelly clog-feet thing. I bet that you're wearing felt clogs, aren't you. At least part of them is felt, and I bet that there's another part that's cork. I'm right, arn't I. You know how I know this?

Last year at Wal*Mart, I found those clogs. Wonderful. Comfortable. On sale. Seven bucks. All in size seven - My size. My inner shoe fetish took over. I bought them in black and in navy, in brown and in grey. I loved these clogs. I would have lived in them. However, after about a week of wear, they began to make my feet stink.

I mean stink. In every flower-killing, stomach-turning, mind numbing sense of stink, these shoes did it to me. Sometimes it was better than others - On days with no humidity, or when I didn't really do much, they were almost tolerable. Other days, however, my cat wouldn't even come up and try to trip me because of the stench emanating from my shoes. Then, I had a flash of insight.

"I know!" I cried to myself. "It's the moisture! The moisture gets into the felt, and then the felt gremlins come out and eat it! As we all know, the byproduct of eating is...Well, excretement, and thus the odor is the excretement of the felt goblins!"

((OKay, so it wasn't exactly like that, but it was close enough.))

For several months now, these shoes have been in my closet, feeding my lingering hope that someday, I'll figure out how to kill the evil goblins. Nothing has been done, because I figured that it was just me. No one else has felt goblins in their shoes. This is giving me new hope, though.

So, anyone know how to make the evil little things go away so that I can wear my beloved shoes again?

-- Anonymous, July 14, 2000

Answers

Oops! I didn't see this forum when I posted in Pamie's dream thread.

Ladies, dryer sheets! Put them in over night and go fear-free the next day in your clogs.

I'm here for y'all. Call me the Martha Stewart of footwear

-- Anonymous, July 15, 2000

Squirt some Febreeze in your shoes everynight. Not only does it make 'em smell better, it kills some of that nasty bacteria.

-- Anonymous, July 15, 2000

Thanks for the tips all. But what do you do about stinky Birkenstock feet? Is there a cure-all for that??? I love my sandals but GOOD LORD.

-- Anonymous, July 15, 2000

Sandals or any kind of open shoes, worn without socks, are going to cause more smell problems because there's no sock to absorb the sweat, and not enough shoe coverage to block the smell from getting into the air. That's why I never wear 'em. Although the tips people mentioned may help, I don't know.

-- Anonymous, July 17, 2000

heee heee heee... felt goblins! makes me laugh...

ah... others who have the limburger problem! i nearly stank my best friend and my sister out of the car by taking off my beloved clogs. i swear, the car smelled like rancid blue cheese. and it's not always clogs - i have a great pair of linen mary janes that do the same thing.

i went to harnett's, the local alternative health store, and picked up green goddess foot powder. you can sprinkle some of this in your shoes and let it sit for the night. same idea as the others, really.

-- Anonymous, July 17, 2000

You know why feet and cheese smell alike? Because they contain the same acids.

Gross, huh?

-- Anonymous, July 17, 2000

Hey! I tried the dryer sheets and some Febreeze (who thought of that name?) on a couple of pairs of problem shoes...and it worked! Joy!

-- Anonymous, July 18, 2000

Hey! I tried the dryer sheets and some Febreeze (who thought of that name?) on a couple of pairs of problem shoes...and it worked! Joy! Thanks!

-- Anonymous, July 18, 2000

Meghan!

Try using good old fashioned talcum powder. Even the cheapest baby powder will work. Repeated use of Febreeze will cause irritation if your skin is tender.

-- Anonymous, July 19, 2000