New health discovery!

How to more than double the strength of all your organs, bones and cells in your body the easy way.

When the early astronauts went into space, they discovered that when they came back, that during their time of weightlessness, they had lost bone mass and muscle mass. They discovered that every cell of your body responds to gravity changes. Now to prevent loss of muscle and bone mass, the astronauts jump on a trampoline before and after each space flight.

Albert Carter wrote a book about this theory. It is called “the Miracle of Rebounding”. Look up his website by entering his name in your search engine. He discovered that if you simply jump on a mini trampoline about 4 or 5 times per day at about 2 to 5 minutes each time, you can fool all the cells of your body into thinking that you live under more gravity. Your body responds to this increase in gravity change in a very positive way. You don’t need to get out of breath jumping, but simply jump to increase the gravity.

Albert Carter took several mini trampolines into an old folks home and started them on a regular jumping session several times a day. 3 months later he came back to this home and every person that participated had greatly increased in strength and general health and well being.

Al Carter was invited by the Hong Kong Police Force to teach the police force the rebounding technique. They even had him develop a superior soft bounce trampoline.

You can buy a regular mini trampoline for about $35. I have seen them in thrift stores for only $5. Get started jumping on a mini trampoline and you’ll be amazed how strong you’ll get in about 2 months.

You will be able to run up a flight of stairs twice as fast as you do now. Once you start this program, you should never quit, because if you quit, your body will revert back to how it was before in a very short time.

Al Carter’s 10 year old daughter beat all the boys in her class in arm wrestling! As you can see this is really worth doing. If you have health problems or heart disease, you will greatly increase your chances of recovery!

-- Anonymous, January 03, 2001

Answers

Whoa, whoa, wait!

I thought it was COLLOIDAL SILVER that was the miracle cure?

Or am I supposed to bounce on a trapoline while chewing on a dime? Should I ingest barleygreen powder and carrot juice as I jump up and down? Maybe I could supplement the effect with copper and silver bracelets, a Power Pyramid(tm) (topped by a Crystal[tm]) on my head?

And if I do these things in publlic, at what point do the neighbors call the men in white coats to carry me off for extended therapy?

-- Anonymous, January 04, 2001

If you do all the above while refusing to pay taxes, you won't have to wait on the men in the white coats...

-- Anonymous, January 04, 2001

if it works for astros--hey i,ll check it out!!

geesh what a bunch a smarty pants!!

grinch er oos??

-- Anonymous, January 04, 2001

Poole, I thought you had more class than that!

Now you're also acting like an asshole.

How very sad.

-- Anonymous, January 05, 2001

Um....."mary"....

Since when was calling bullshit by its right name considered "acting like an asshole"?

Maybe you need to see your attitude-adjustment professional.

-- Anonymous, January 07, 2001

Mary,

If your definition of "class" includes tolerating morons who spout pseudo-scientific nonsense, then I guess I will somehow have to struggle through life without your approval and endorsement.

:)

-- Anonymous, January 07, 2001