Y'all, I should so be in bed right now. AB and Al are in the air and the Bermanator is probably just getting back to NoVa.

T - did you get your flowers?

"See" y'all tomorrow.

-- Anonymous, January 21, 2001

Answers

Good morning, my angels.

Vegas!

We missed you, T. There are stories for you to hear, oh yes.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I know you fools aren't still sleeping. Where are you, jags?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

No, I didn't get flowers. Where did you send them to? I was at Chris' the whole weekend. But then, if they were at my housem, you'd think my roommate would tell me, but then, she's a bitch.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Mayn! We sent them to Chris's house. Wonder what happened?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Hmm. I don't know. We got the ones from his mom on Saturday, but then that was it. Thank you so much, though! For the thought.

I hope y'all had a great time. I feel a lot better - just puffy. I am Puffy T.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Well, just so you know, they were tulips. Pretty tulips.

You Puffy T! You numbah one Puffy!

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

All right, y'all. I have to go to work for a while. I'll try to get online from there.

Don't get in trouble while I'm gone!

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Oh! Tulips! I love tulips. I had a dream about tulips, actually.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I swear. I jsut read Meg McRipoff's journal. She sucks. Blatant Pam stealing, for one, plus her entries are little more than un-funny gender bashing emails.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

No! I'm here. I just came in late.

Teri - we almost called you at like 3 a.m. EST time just to let you hear the chinese karaoke. You would've busted your stiches out.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Oh! Chinese karaoke! I wish I was there. Did Mike Dance? Y'all, I hate to admit that I don't really, really remember our conversations.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

YOu sounded totally with it on Saturday though.

Yes, Mike danced. Allison sang Patsy Cline and Anna Beth and I represented NKOTB. All is right with the world.

What did y'all do on Sunday?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Y'all. I'm at work and I want to look at the Vegas pictures. Can somebody give me the URL? I know it's ericajackson.com something.

I'm no photographic memory numbah one.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I overdid it on Saturday what with the getting out of bed and all, so I stayed in bed and on the sofa for most of Saturday. Courtney took me to get a pedicure since I can't bend over, really, and that was very nice of her. She also brought me little peanut butter cups (my favorite kind). Chris went to the bookstore and bought me Soul Mountain without me even telling him that I wanted to read it because he is the nicest. He bought himself the Churchill book that I was going to get him, though, so now I need to think of another book to get him as a thank-you for being so wonderful this weekend. Then we ate Italian take-out and watched the Simpsons and went to sleep. Or at least, I went to sleep.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I'm in!

And yes T, I sang and danced. And did not sleep.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

T...you didn't get your flowers??!?!?!?!?!?!?! I am going to have to check on that.

Y'all. Vegas. Seriously.

I just got into Greenspun. Today it not the day for The Man to be jacking with MATH, now!

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Oh, I wish I was able to see y'all dance.

My meds were odd. I always thought I was lucid, but I can't remember much at all. Hmm.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I may never want to go to Vegas again. What's left to do? Good lord.

I don't suppose you have any pictures of Clyde, T?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I don't know what could have happened to the flowes. Someone was home all the time.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Ooh, there are pictures aplenty. Even C, the most squeamish person on the planet, looked at them. I haven't seen tehm yet, though. I'll see them in two weeks.

Rest assured that I'll try to post on on that "Show us what you're working with" thread.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Good to see that pamie had fun...

Hannah, how can you be nervous about the pics? You're the most photogenic person ever.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

What's the URL for y'all's Vegas pictures??!

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Quoting Erica

"Hey all,

I've put the pictures up, but haven't built the pages yet. You can search through the folders for pics, most Squishite photos are in the Rio and Tong's folders, here:

http://www.ericajackson.com/goes_to/vegas/i

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Oh my god, look at this one: http://ericajackson.com/goes_to/vegas/i/rio/an_al_mike_han.jpg

I love it. We all look jacked up. Why can't I have a good smile AND my eyes open?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

So what did y'all do on Sunday?

Montego wasn't even excited to see me. She sucks.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Flew, came home, went to bed.

The guy next to me on the plane must think I'm the most pretentious asshole ever. I had headphones on the entire flight, read The New Yorker and wrote for, like, two hours. Then I whipped out my cellphone as soon as we stopped at the gate to let my parents know I landed safely. He was from Vegas heading to D.C. for a conference, and I'm sure he was like "East Coasters are just rude."

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

You didn't get together for lunch or anything? Any more gambling?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Yeah, we had breakfast at like 11:30, and then I had to catch my flight. No word on what the Texans did in our absence.

I have no idea how you woke up so early. I'd still be asleep if the phone hadn't jangled at 10:30.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Poor, poor Mike when I called Paris and woke him up at 10:25. He was so trying to fake coherence.

Me and Anna Beth and Chris literally staggered through the streets of Vegas, shopping and whatnot. Chris sent an e-mail this morning that said "I believe after yesterday I have now seen every faux European architectural style there is." We also made him go to the OTHER Sephora's where I did not even find a replacement for my glitter lip gloss (RIP). I got sick in the bathroom of Virgin Records at Caesar's. We were all miserably tired and barely spoke.

Literally, AB and I did not speak more than three words to each other from Vegas to Denver. Vocalization would have taken too much effort. But you know, our eyes, when they were open, said it all.

So, the highlight of Sunday was definitely the breakfast/ lunch back at Fred's La Patisserie.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Y'all, tell me the photo in our homefront ear right now doesn't look exactly like AB.

www.usatoday.com

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Oh, glitter lip gloss. "Y'all, the worst thing in the world has happened."

I don't remember walking to the Stratosphere. I just remember being there all of a sudden.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

The one of Julia? It totally does. Of course, it would look more like her if she was all drunk and eating rice with two straws.

I really like the redesign, by the way.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Yeah, it's nice, but I feel like it's my first day. I'm slogging through dozens of e-mails on changes to the system.

Should I register "bermanater.com?" It seems a poor substitute for "bermanator.com," but the latter is taken.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Okay, I can't even begin to quote this whole entry, but y'all. Y'all! Has Meg even MET a man before? Besides the mayor?

"Man Phrase: You look wonderful in that dress. Thanks for wearing it just for me and our special evening together. (Who says this? Ever?)

Meaning of Phrase: You look like a hooker trying to attract potential clients in that dress. Thank God no other respectable man that you might be interested would look at you in that thing. You've made me secure and given me the knowledge that we will be getting it on later. Alone. "

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

The first bit of dialogue is straight out of a Harlequin romance. Literally.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

She's a freak.

If she had ever met a man, and clearly, she has not, it would go more like this:

Man Phrase: "I really like your friend Hannah."

Meaning of Phrase: "That Hannah girl is FINE, dude."

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

The entry got worse. I spared you.

Plus, she's dressing up like the Easter Bunny. More fun photos!

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

What time did the Meat of Cheese leave?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

His flight left at 6:30. We all went to the airport together. We were all so whipped when we finally got there, we were like "bye."

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I told y'all, Meg is totally ripping off lame battle-of-the-sexes emails that have been circulating for years. She sucks. I swear my cousin sent me that same lame email like a year ago.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Wait - Mike sang "Eat It?"

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Except she tweaked it and made it worse, even though I didn't think that was possible.

While I was reading it I wanted to send her an email that just said "plagerizer."

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Y'all (except for Allison, who's already seen it),

I created a thread for Sock Puppet Companions, if anyone has any thoughts.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Oh yes. Mike sang Eat It, AND My Sharona and um... one other one. Shit. Uh...Oh, yes, Tainted Love.

He was very good.

I know we're not supposed to care about out titles, but I'm very happy to be a Rockstar. And how appropriate that it turned last night.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Have y'all seen the DUMB plans for some Atlanta meeting? Whatevuh.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

From PigFatt:

Why can't the people (Well one person in particular) post their Vegas stories in the appropriate place? It seems like every thread I read this morning has the same boring story that I couldn't give 2 shits about in it. I'm glad you had fun (well not really) but damn do you have to post it 15 times in every single thread on here. I'm just sayin.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Is that from the fuzz thread?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Yep, the fuzz thread. I don't know why I even go there.

Mike, Chris wants to know if you'd be interested in joining his fantasy baseball league, or if you would give him advice when the time comes. He reached his goal of coming in third last season, but I think that this year, he's ready for Bertha to take it all. (his team's name is Bertha. It's after a Greatful Dead Song. But he's not a big hippie. Anyway.)

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I'm sure that, on the other hand, the Fuzz will be the soul of restraint after their debacle of a gathering.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

And I'm all about fantasy baseball.

Although actually, isn't that almost as bad as being big in the ferret community?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Oh, for real.

leigha: Oh, you're the fuzziest!

rudergirl: But remember when Fuzzman wore his fuzzy pants and then sang the fuzzy duet with Fuzzerina?

It's Kat: Oh my god! That was the FUZZIEST! How could I forget that?

BigMatt: Why won't you ladies get fuzzy nekkid????

rudergirl: Oh, but it was so fuzzy SAD when Jessifer spontaneously combusted! I can't believe that :( :( :(

leigha: *hugs****

BigMatt: I wonder if it was because I wanted to fuzzy sleep with her? ***Hugs*** for Jessifer!

and so it goes...

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Wait. Who's been talking about it in other threads??

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

My nemesis.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

No, who's been talking about Vegas in other threads?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Ok, wait. Who is PigFatt talking about? Me, I guess? I posted all over the place this morning, tonge-in-cheekly. Well, actually, I think I posted in DSAS and the stupid Dear Squishites, but that's because I was showing off for DUMB. I'm sure those are the only two thread he reads besides the retarded padding ones, so maybe that means "all over the place" to him. God, he's a bitch. I love the "well, one person in particular" thing, and the "I don't really care" part.

Seriously, I know he's not trying to start shit with ME, people. THAT can only lead to heartache. I am so tired today, I will smack him down and get his ass booted fast enough to make his big fat head spin.

And HOW the F has L_L, my BELOVED L_L, gone to the dark side?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I know. How could L_L find anything in common with them.

Dear PigFatt - I'm sorry if our talk of the Squishy fest has interfered in your fuzz chatting.

And y'al, why does it not surprise me in the least that RG has a papasan chair.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Well, none of the DUMB-asses responded to PigFatt, so hmm.

I think that L_L is ignorant of their asses. She was out for about a month, remember. I think that if she had to take a stance, she'd be neutral. She's the type who takes everything with a grain of salt.

Mike, he's in this boys-only, a lot of lawyers Fantasy league. I think the kitty is $500 (not too shabby). I imagine that he'll want to email you - he gets really into it.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

He's just jealous because the parole officer won't let him leave the state, so he couldn't go.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

He == PigFatt. I posted before reading T's message.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Gaaaah! Now PigFatt's talking about strip clubs!

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Y'all, his mom went to a strip club when she was last in Atlanta.

What chance did the guy have?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

He's an idiot. No one even responded to his Vegas hatin' in the fuzz thread.

Y'all, my Bruce and Steve thread is going along nicely. Success. I finally seemed to start a topic people were actually interested in.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Mike, I just sent Chris what I think is your most recent Roto Roost column. He gets really, really into fantasy baseball. And comic books.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

poor Drew. He's so clueless.

I hate them. How can pamie fear MATH when she should spend all her energy fearing fuzz?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Mike, do you write one of those columns a day during baseball season? Wow. You numbah one hard workah!!

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Mike numbah one on the fantasy base-a-ball. He rearry is. You ask him question, he give you ansah. Sometime, it like he speaking Chinese, but rearry, he just speaking Manese.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Every day I'm here, yes.

And y'all? I can't stop the accent. You numbah one!

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Mr. Woo set to take ovah the worrrd!

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Al: does whiny baby=pigfatt?

Dear Chubby Piglet -

Suck it.

The MATH Club

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Allison, you take the cake. "Dear Whiny Baby"!

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Yes, Whiny Baby is PigFatt but Chubby Piglet would have been much better.

No, T. YOU take the cake with your post about attending the "Atlanta Squishycon" and wearing your MATH shirt. HEHEHEEHEHEEEEEE!

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

T, you should so do that. But have some backup.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Hmm, maybe I'll post a later to Chubby Piglet.

Yes, T, I almost choked when i read that. You so mean.

Al - did P say anything on Saturday, like she was glad she did it, or anything?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I mean Sunday

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Hold up one second. Hold the F up.

"Dear Jackie, Todd, Cary, Chelle, Scooby, Deanne, Dee, Danny, Alba, and hopefully Ben, John, and Amy (is that everybody?):

This is going to be insane! The new Casa de Trash won't be able to take the pressure of everyone converging on it at once!

But am I looking forward to it? You bet your ass I am...

See you in April!

Much love, rudergirl"

Did she just say Casa de Trash???

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

She did, but I KNOW she didn't. Casa de Trash...that would be ours.

Pamie said she had a good time. She literally ran out the door Sunday morning, though, so we didn't have much time to talk. I don't even feel like I talked to her all weekend.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Nice plagerism.

I hate her. With fire.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Didn't Mike dedicate "Eat It" to the residents of New Jag City? I just remembered that.

T - I know you want to go call RG out over the CdeT.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Yes, I did. Jagizens unite.

El Presidente had to represent, after all.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Y'all, I just had another hour-long basketball meeting. We have a sports meeting at 5:30.

Why didn't I just stay in Vegas?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Fred apparently has sent me an e-mail with his personal recap of Vegas. I have yet to receive it, but will share it with all when it arrives. I can't wait. Y'all know it's gonna be like:

Dear Vegas,

You are the city of my dreams. The women. The songs. The women singing me songs.

Love, Fred

~Fred...the two of us need look no mooooooore!~

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Man. Fred. He just couldn't have been any better.

It went so fast!

Anna Beth no more work! Anna Beth come back to play on MATH forum.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Allison writes on the SquishyCrush thread:

"I think I want to legally marry Hannah, but that's only because Anna Beth is already married, so she's out as an option."

Just a point of information: Hannah is also legally married after her exchange of rings with the Master of Ceremonies, which we all witnessed. So that might be an obstacle for her as well. And if it wasn't, you might have to fight me for her.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Hey wait! I didn't catch that part about only wanting me bc Anna Beth was legally married already.

Jag.

And yes, Joel Feng Chen and I are in love. I'm moving out there next week and I'll be his co-KJ.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Yeah, so screw you, Mike. She's Joel Feng's girl. And please, I am already having to fight the Meat of Cheese for her, I'd appreciate it if you, too, didn't stab me in the back.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Actually, I'm Ray's girl, although he doesn't know it yet.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

First of all, I think we have a lot more comptetition for her then Meat of Cheese. For example, everyone who heard her sing, and the bartenders who carded her and AB.

But how can I comptete with the man with the power to change the restaraunt's name to "Hannah's Palace."

Story of my life.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

You guys no touch my wife.

She bangs.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I'm going home now. I'll check in later.

Since Vegas I'm just hungry at all hours of the day.

My question is, where and when are we ALL (T!) getting together again?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I wish they would change it to Hannah's Palace. That would have made it much easier to find.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

FYI, y'all: Heather just posted on DSAS. She seems to be doing well. Tres bien.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Jazzfest?

Well, I'm planning on being there, at least.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Fred's recap was good. I thought he'd elaborate more on his moment in the spotlight, but whatev.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I liked it. I have to write mine eventually. Maybe I'll do it tonight at home and post it tomorrow.

He wasn't kidding about the bathroom, either.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

I'm home. I want to go to bed right now but I can't! I have to go back to Eckerd's and pick up my pictures. I just know none of them came out. Those crappy little cameras in pitch dark Tong's...

Hilarious that y'all are discussing karaoke videos on the Vegas thread. I don't think I watched a single one of them except the the water skiing one.

God, I loved Tong's. But - and y'all are going to think this is the most retarded thing you've ever heard - I am being honest when I say that my self-esteem was shot from that experience. I don't think I ever want to do karaoke again. I felt like a chess champion who got her ass kicked in a checkers tournament. I know. That's obnoxious. But that's how I feel. All day long I've had waking nightmares recalling my singing.

I'm afraid it like, may make me develop stage fright! The thing I have the most confidence in was the thing I sucked the most at this weekend.

Ah, boo hoo. I guess I'll go write a letter to myself. Hugs.

Oh - the flowers people called me. They didn't try to deliver them until TODAY and no one was there. Thanks, jags. And now, T's going out of town, right? Will she be at work tomorrow, does anyone know?

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Y'all. The pictures. I just got them and, oh yes, they came out. I was screaming at the drug store. Howling.

Tomorrow.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Oh Allison, quit. You were good. Everyone thought so.

See, the roll in my camera now is a 36er and I only took 20 shots. I don't know what to do?? The film was $13 in the Paris store. I don't think I can afford to just develop it now.

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001

Um, how much do I love Fred? That's what I thought.

"Oh, Allison, sitting behind the podium singing, nay, begging me to release her from my gravity of love, oh, it melted my heart. Oh, am I not supposed to post about Vegas in every thread? Because, uh, that's what I'm doing. I just want everybody to know what a great weekend I had. I, too, am crushing on everybody that was there."

-- Anonymous, January 22, 2001