Since the other threads getting full, and we do love these so.

Strife, too, plagues this community--especially the romantic kind.

A recent breakup you may recall involved two famous artists--one an actress, one a guy who's accomplished in another creative endeavor. Hot, hot, hot were the vibes from this openly sexual duo. Tonguing in the street, heaven knows what else off the pavement.

The prob, however, turned out to be that the guy in this cute couple liked to get kinky not just with his g-f, but with a dude or two, as well--just to keep things interesting.

Hey, you don't have to convince moi the guy thang can be intriguing. Bothered her, though. Can't say I blame the babe. Shouldn't sneak around like that, mister. Very bad habit.

Well, bark, bark, bark goes yet another dog--i.e., dude (same difference). When will my sex ever learn, is what I want to know.

-- Anonymous, August 23, 2001

Answers

Well, here's the too-easy-to-be-right guess: Jeff Koons (artist, known for his "Puppy" sculpture) and Ilona Ciccolini (actress, though mostly in porn films, and I'm sure I misspelled her name). They were one of those couples who wanted absolutely everyone on the planet to know how much sex they were having with each other. But I don't think she's well known enough to qualify for a Ted Blind Item, though.

Did Pam and Tommy Lee break up again?

-- Anonymous, August 23, 2001

Yes, but they've been broken up for awhile, so it's not "recent." And while Tommy is for sure a dog, I don't think he plays on both teams.

All the recent break-ups I can think of are actor/actor.

-- Anonymous, August 23, 2001

And while Tommy is for sure a dog, I don't think he plays on both teams.

Actually, I have heard he does. Of course, I can't remember where, so I might have made it up.

-- Anonymous, August 23, 2001

Hmmm. Perhaps on the Pamela Anderson thing. What about her and Kid Rock? They were VERY publically affectionate at several public events, and it certainly would make sense for Ted to say "yet another dog." And "bad habit" as well.

-- Anonymous, August 23, 2001

It's not very good this week:

Take an A-list actor who has received considerable kudos for his wacky and right-on supporting-character performances--less so his politics. A male bud of this partick dude asked his Oscar-nominated pal to fix him up with an Academy Award-type actress with whom the star pretends friendship.

"Oh, let me fix you up with somebody else," he offered, "because she is such a bitch!"

Well, let's just say that fans and admirers of this pixie-ish pretty lady would be most surprised to hear that unflattering information. Besides, look who's talking--this is a man who eats directors (and costars) for a living!

Supporting Actor Oscar nominee with right-wing politics. I'm blanking right now, but I haven't had coffee yet.

-- Anonymous, August 30, 2001

Pixie-ish--Winona Ryder?

I'll have to think on the guy.

-- Anonymous, August 30, 2001

Winona was my first pixie thought too.

And as for "eats directors and co-stars", Edward Norton popped into my head, simply because I just read an article about him and how he tends to get all up in the director.

I'm still thinking. Those are not my final answers.

-- Anonymous, August 30, 2001

I like Edward Norton, especially if "eats his costars" is a dirty joke under the radar (i.e. him dating Courtney Love during People vs. Larry Flynt filming). But has he been criticized for his political stances? And I think he is supposed to be friends with Winona. But wouldn't her reputation as "Wanna Ride-Her" have come up somewhere in the item?

-- Anonymous, August 30, 2001

Through rain, snow, sleet, and mass tragedy, there will always be Ted. Yesterday's Blind Item:

There must be something in the water in Hollywood. Is everyone falling off the oh so white wagon?

This week's addiction predilection involves a behind-the-scenes artsy dude with a taste for the illegal--in many fashions. The popular movie man (who dates a well-known music mama) sure likes to delve into the wacky and weird.

At a recent on-set shindig, the talented trooper held court in the substance circle. Ingesting more and more of this magical concoction, the not so primo partyer proclaimed, with Napoleonic fervor: "I am a genius!"

Why does it only take a little bit of nose candy to turn these macho men into boisterous braggarts? Don't you guys get enough praise from your peeps--paid and otherwise?

Let's just hope the brilliance of this flick-slick is not chemically challenged on his latest work.

Oh, wait -- no, that one can't be that easy.

-- Anonymous, September 28, 2001

I *suck* at these. I can't even think of any movie guys who date rock star chicks. Only the other way around.

-- Anonymous, September 28, 2001

H, I'll give you some clues as to my guess: the "music mama" has been known for on-stage freakouts. Also, the number of words starting with "m" in the item.

-- Anonymous, September 28, 2001

I'm guessing Guy Ritchie. Music Mama? Madonna. Has to be.

-- Anonymous, September 28, 2001

T -- ooh! That guess is actually better than mine, which was Paul Thomas Anderson, since Madonna actually is a mama. And the m's would point to Madonna, not Magnolia.

-- Anonymous, September 28, 2001

Ah but he says dates and Madonna and Guy are married. Plus Guy Ritchie really isn't that popular is he?

However, the only other music mama I can think of is Melissa Ethridge and she's gay.

Or Courtney Love. She was hooked up with Edward Norton for a while but I think that's done and he's not really behind-the-scenes.

-- Anonymous, September 28, 2001

I will here state the case for Paul Thomas Anderson:

"behind the scenes" -- so far he's been only a director, not an actor.

"artsy" -- more so than Guy Ritchie.

"music mama" -- Fiona Apple (although possibly Madonna).

"Napoleonic" -- I think I remember hearing he's short, but I'm not sure.

-- Anonymous, September 28, 2001

A drawback to my Guy RItchie theory is that Madonna is more than a "well-known music mama."

-- Anonymous, September 28, 2001

And P.T.A. also just had a movie go into post-production.

-- Anonymous, September 28, 2001

Plus PTA just seems liek the kind of ass who thinks he's a genius even when not coked out of his gourd.

-- Anonymous, September 28, 2001

Yup, it's PTA.

-- Anonymous, September 28, 2001

I have heard some licentious stories, but this titillating tale takes the Christmas cake. Beware, the fresh-baked poop may shock the pants right off ya--it sure did for this studly star.

One particularly popular big-screen babe--who definitely gets my ingredients a-risin'--is quite well known for his winning ways with the chicks (camera on or off). But the sticky story does not involve just one lucky lass. The more the merrier was surely this season's touchy theme.

Our randy rascal was joined by a few (female) foxes and more than one mahn-ly mischief-maker for this risqué romp under the mistletoe. Yeah, that's right, sugarplums, this story involves what's known among the more plentifully minded as an orgy.

The humpable honey surely played with all the lipsticked pusses, but he also didn't shy away from the mixed nuts offered at this grindin' get-down. Are you close to cracking this one?

Think boyish benevolence, and you just might.

Any ideas?

-- Anonymous, December 13, 2001

I'm thinking Ben Affleck, for some reason.

-- Anonymous, December 13, 2001

See, I'm not sure Ben Affleck is known as a romancer onscreen -- his romance roles (Pearl Harbor, that movie with Sandra Bullock) tend to get panned. Besides, it's hard to believe Ted wouldn't include at least one reference to Matt Damon.

I'm having serious trouble. The references to "ingredients" . . . someone who's associated with food or cooking?

-- Anonymous, December 13, 2001

And all the baked goods. Hmm. Why can I not think of anyone who has played a cook or a chef?

-- Anonymous, December 13, 2001

I'm thinking John Cusack.

-- Anonymous, December 13, 2001

But "boyish benevolence" -- isn't John Cusack said to be a bit of an asshole?

If only we had a list of Men Ted Likes; it's not as long as you'd think.

-- Anonymous, December 13, 2001

Hint: he always uses alliteration if the star's name is double-lettered, like Vince Vaughn. (Although I don't think it's him. Just an example.)

-- Anonymous, December 13, 2001

I've heard conflicting reports about John Cusack.

-- Anonymous, December 13, 2001

well there's Joshua Jackson aka Pacey from Dawson's Creek who has made movies.

-- Anonymous, December 13, 2001

What are the clues?

1. Boyish benevolence
2. Christmas themed
3. food/dessert themed

I cheated adn went to Fametracker but they didn't have any good guesses either. But the Blind Item does end with:

Piece be with you Whatever that means.

-- Anonymous, December 13, 2001

. . . and currently working in a restaurant on Dawson's Creek. Good call, Melissa! Though I wonder if Ted wouldn't be more likely to call him a "small-screen stud" or similar.

-- Anonymous, December 13, 2001

Richard Gere was a chef in Autumn in NY, worst movie ever.

-- Anonymous, December 14, 2001

Okay, this one looks like fun:

Oh, dear. Perhaps a diary would have been a better place to enter what I'm about to reveal to you.

Female half of a celebrated (and mucho attractive) couple was on a commercial airline recently. First class, in case you were wondering, and I know you were.

Our gal was dressed elegant cazh, as is her wont, and she was a bit distracted, don't know why. After all, nobody was approaching her during the flight, as she often emits an air of standoffishness. Must be that impossibly snotty upbringing of hers.

So, snot-chick deplanes. The first-class attendants then straighten things a bit before the cleanup crew arrives. And heavens above, what do the friendly-sky types discover in the departed actress' seat?

A day planner with a peculiar entry on each and every day of the week.

The handwritten reminder consisted of two words, the second word being the name of her good-lookin' b-f. And right before that increasingly well known boy's moniker is the word...Blow.

Hmmm. What could the babe possibly have meant by such a curious term? Blow off?

Maybe. Hear they're no longer an item, in fact. I guess the gal was just a little too rigid in her ways--unlike him, if you know what I mean.

(Those who soften up once in a while--and not by appointment only-- have the most fun.)

-- Anonymous, January 03, 2002

Oh man, I don't know, and I'm sure this is wrong, but how I hope it's Gwennie.

-- Anonymous, January 03, 2002

That was my first thought also, Hannah! The snotty upbringing and goody-two shoes stuff seemed like a dead give-away.

-- Anonymous, January 03, 2002

My first thought too -- "increasingly-known" on the bf rules out Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt -- but two caveats: (1) I haven't heard that Gwyneth and Luke Wilson broke up, and (2) I thought Ted liked Gwyneth on average.

O/t: I think "Gwyneth" is a pretty name, but I'd be reluctant to give it to a kid and have everyone say, "Like the actress?"

-- Anonymous, January 03, 2002

I thought Ted liked Gwyneth on average

I don't know...didn't he used to call her "Fish Stick"?

-- Anonymous, January 03, 2002

And Luke Wilson would certainly apply on the "increasingly" thing, and they sure are pretty.

But I don't really see any obvious clues that point to him. He's been in SO many movies lately, you'd think that Ted would drop at least one clear clue. I don't know.

And I think it's also that we DON'T know that this couple broke up, since Ted just heard..

-- Anonymous, January 03, 2002

Hmm. "Elegant cazh" and "snooty upbringing" would certainly point Gwyn-ward. Do you think "by appointment only" is a clue?

-- Anonymous, January 03, 2002

Today's:

Big foreign star hits town--and a few bars. Not too many people know this chiseled hottie just loves to lap up his libations. Also a bit of a secret is the following: When the attached megasuccessful guzzler's noggin' was sufficiently loosened up, he, well, let loose on his love life. "Yeah, she smoked my pole," the dreamboat drinker said to his buddies about one of his equally famous (not as attached) former costars. "Uh-huh." Doesn't surprise me, really, as both of these beautiful peeps have quite the raunchy rep when it comes to scintillating smoke signals. It just so happens not everybody's as familiar with the spiller's plumes as they are with the red-hot babe's fiery ways. No butts about it.

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

First thought: Antonio Banderas and Angelina Jolie. Except, wait, she's attached.

Then I have no idea.

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

Ted also said that the "snot-chick" is not Sarah Michelle Gellar (and frankly, I'm glad, though I can see where the guess came from). And that said snot-chick has been "separated" before. Another point for Gwyneth?

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

Hugh Jackman and Halle Berry?

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

I take that back, because then Ted talks glowingly about Gwyn and Luke on a plane to Dallas, her chatting up the flight attendant and everything.

So my new guess (for the snot-chick, not the foreign hunk) is Minnie Driver.

Hmm. Smoking, alliteration . . . who's known for smoking?

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

Aw, man, it better not be Hugh Jackman, after I just read that GQ article about how nice he is and how he and his wife just adopted a boy and all that. I can't remember whether it said he smoked or not.

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

Halle Berry is definitely attached though, she's married to Eric Benet.

I was thinking Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman. He's been married for years I believe and she was attached when they made Moulin Rouge but not anymore. And he would have been in the states over the last month promoting Black Hawk Down.

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

red-hot babe's fiery ways

And that would make sense since Nicole has red hair, but the clues don't really point towards Ewan. "mega"successful? BIG star? Chisled features? I don't know. What about Russel Crowe and Nicole Kidman? I thought they just worked together and there have been rumors about them before. Except he's not attached either.

I suck at these.

-- Anonymous, January 10, 2002

Well, Russell Crowe is chiseled and megasuccessful, but I am not convinced about Nicole. What about Lolita Davidovich? she co-starred with him in Mystery, Alaska, and is married and is definitely a redhead. As for the alliteration that Ted loves, I can't find it, but Lolita debuted as a stripper in Blaze - maybe that's the fiery / smoking angle? she's not equally successful though. Nicole's the only "megasuccessful" redhead that comes to mind.

-- Anonymous, January 14, 2002

Okay, I got that backwards, since the pole-smokER is not attached and the pole-smokEE is. Not Russell and Lolita, I guess. Carry on.

-- Anonymous, January 14, 2002

Going back to snot chick, could it be Minnie Driver and Josh Brolin? Because apparently they are recently broken up and she strikes me as snotty. And there was the famous Matt Damon break up. And he's not earth-shatteringly famous but getting better known.

Tangentially, I heard today that Minnie Driver is now seeing the recently-divorced Harrison Ford. That ain't right.

-- Anonymous, January 14, 2002

A snitfest is sizzling behind the scenes of one box-office disappointment. And it's getting uglier by the day.

It seems that a certain respected actor and his revered director pal are blaming each other for the less than glittery returns. One camp faults the director's "artistic vision," while the other complains that the movie has turned into another vehicle for the scene-stealing star.

Of course, with such huge names attached to the film, no one wants to fess up and admit the movie puttered out almost as quickly as it opened. Especially when egos--and a friendship--are at stake.

So, the behind-the-scenes backstabbing continues to grow more vicious by the day, and the once chummy relationship is beginning to show noticeable signs of strain.

Oh, please. These two fightin' boys have so many damn accolades under their designer belts, you'd think they could handle at least one flaccid flick between them.

Think (and zip) again.

Vanilla Sky, maybe? Though I didn't think it did that badly.

-- Anonymous, January 31, 2002

Maybe. Cruise and Crowe have worked together before and are friends off screen so that fits.

Or The Majestic which had an acclaimed director although I'm not sure that Jim Carey is a "respected" actor.

But the "flacid flick" and "zip again" make me think sex and/or penis so maybe something with Mark Whalberg? Rock Star tanked pretty hard though I don't remember a big director. OH, Planet of the Apes. Tim Burton, Mark Whalberg? Are they friends behind the scenes?

-- Anonymous, January 31, 2002

I think it's not Vanilla Sky since that was our first impressions. I don't think Planet of the Apes because it did pretty well box-office wise, right? Also, Marky Mark and Burton aren't friends. They'd never met until Mark's audition.

I never have guesses. I just shoot down other's.

-- Anonymous, January 31, 2002

Could it be A Beautiful Mind?

-- Anonymous, January 31, 2002

Beautiful Mind did pretty well. "Flaccid Flick" and "Zip Again" make me think it's Tom Cruise and Camerone Crowe - remember Tom's scene in Magnolia?

-- Anonymous, January 31, 2002

Beautiful Mind is still doing well and will sweep the Oscars so I doubt that's it.

Planet of the Apes probably isn't it but it didn't do very well in the US at all. It opened big for one weekend and then dropped like a safe on Wile E. Coyote.

Sounds like Vanilla Sky is the best guess.

-- Anonymous, January 31, 2002

How about Ali? It didn't exactly light up the box office. Admittedly, I don't even know who directed it and if he's tight with Will Smith.

-- Anonymous, January 31, 2002

Ali makes sense.

-- Anonymous, January 31, 2002

Ali is directed by Michael Mann, but I've never heard of him being chummy with Will Smith. The fighting stuff would make sense though.

"Vanilla Sky" is most obvious.

"Beautiful Mind' is doing well and I've only heard Russell Crowe singing Ron Howard's praises.

What about Robert Redford/Brad Pitt with "Spy Game?"

-- Anonymous, January 31, 2002

Robert Redford is good... y'all know how Ted is with his alliteration- as-clue.

-- Anonymous, January 31, 2002

Spy Game did fairly well though, it was #1 for a couple of weeks. It was no Lord of the Rings but it did better than Vanilla Sky and Ali. And I don't think Tony Scott is really a name director; he's had a couple of hits (Crimson Tide, Enemy of the State) with Top Gun being the biggest but you don't really here his name that much; ceretainly not as often as his brother.

Ali I can believe just because I think the entire reason it sucked ass was the directing. Will Smith was amazing but man. . . overuse of slow motion much? Overuse of musical groups/singers much? If I wanted to watch a damn music video I'd turn on MTV2. But Michael Mann would never own up to how badly it sucked.

-- Anonymous, February 01, 2002

And then I just realized that Tony Scott did True Romance with Brad Pitt so that works for Spy Game although the clues don't point very Pittward.

-- Anonymous, February 01, 2002