Hi Everyone,

My fiance and I are getting married June 6th,2002 and we were wondering if premaritial classes are required if you're not getting married inside a church?We are having an outside wedding with a priest performing.Also where do I find information throughout the church when they have the classes available.I have called and called the churches and no one ever answers.We don't attend church every sunday but we usually just go on the holidays and special dates.We both grew up catholic,but my fiance wants to have a baptist minister marry us because he thinks that catholic is too specific.Anyway any information about the premariitial classes would be appreciated.

Good Luck to all the soon to be newlyweds.

Nicole Dunham

-- NICOLE NOEL DUNHAM (aaronnicole_00@Hotmail.com), November 12, 2001

Answers

Nicole:
If you and your fiance are both fallen-away Catholics, and he in fact thinks Matrimony, a sacrament of the Catholic Church is ''too specific''; doesn't it seem to you a SIN, --to enter into this kind of marriage? What good will ''classes'' do either of you? By admitting you only attend Holy Mass whenever you feel like it, you proclaim your independence from Christ's Church. What do you need a Catholic priest for? He can't perform an empty ceremony; and God would not bless such a union, between hypocrites.

I know this sounds harsh. Let me state clearly, it's your actions I'm attacking, and not you personally. After all, you are both free. Do as you like. But in a Catholic forum, you might as well get a true perspective of the form you expect your wedding to take next June. For two real Catholics, it is absolute nonsense to marry that way.

-- eugene c. chavez (chavezec@pacbell.net), November 12, 2001.

Hi, Nicole.
I'm have to agree basically with many things Eugene said.
Perhaps without realizing it, you have been traveling a very bad and very dangerous road, and you are about to "jump off lover's leap" and potentially destroy your life. If you exchange vows before a Baptist minister, your "union" will be null and void, and you will begin a relationship of continuous fornication (assuming you are not already in one).

As Catholics, you and your friend do not have the option of attending Mass when you feel like it. We have a serious obligation to attend EVERY Sunday, under pain of mortal sin. If you do not consider yourselves practicing Catholics, you cannot get married in the Church, and you cannot receive pre-marriage classes.

I strongly recommend that you both straighten out your life, starting by visiting the local Catholic "padre" to make a good Confession and join the parish. Then you will be able to contact your bishop's office to get involved in pre-marriage classes. If you do these things, your marriage can be witnessed by a Catholic priest or deacon. However, the Church's law says that your marriage should be in a Catholic church or chapel -- usually within the context of a nuptial Mass. Only the bishop can give an unusual permission for the marriage to occur elsewhere.

God bless you.
John

-- (jfgecik@hotmail.com), November 12, 2001.

Nicole,

I am thoroughly confused. When you say you will have a priest perform the wedding, are you referring to a Catholic priest? If so, have you already talked to one? If you have, then he should have given you the information about the prenuptial classes.

If you have not talked to one, don't be surprised if he makes some major requests of you: 1) Sacrament of Reconciliation 2) Weekly attendance at Mass

These are not requirements just to make it difficult for you, but rather getting both of you to become full members of the Church. After all, marriage is a sacrament and only those that are members of the Church may partake in the sacraments. I will pray that you and your boyfriend will see the importance of committing yourselves to the Catholic Church so that your marriage may be seen as valid in God's eyes.

-- Glenn (glenn@excite.com), November 13, 2001.

My niece is getting marry 9/21/02, she didn't have her premaritial classes,do know of any places that are still giving them in the state of Philadelphia, Pa, or Maryland

-- Elizabeth Matarazzo (elizabeth_matarazzo@nps.gov), May 03, 2002.

Elizabeth,

Has your neice asked her priest about marriage preparation classes? He or someone in her church's staff is probably the best person to ask.

Mateo

-- (MattElFeo@netscape.net), May 03, 2002.