When I was eleven-years-old the The Godfather was on t.v. I asked my mother if I could stay up and watch it but she said, "No! That show is not for little kids to watch." Oh how I wanted to watch that show but I was sent to bed with all my other brothers and sisters.

I lay in bed and waited until my mother and stepfather went to bed and then I snuck out into the livingroom. I turned the volume on the t.v. way down and then turned the t.v. on. I got as close to the t.v. as possible and then turned the volume up just enough so that I could hear it. I laid down on the floor and watched the movie, keeping an ear open for either my mother or stepfather. I figured that if either of them came down the hallway I would hear them and have time to turn the t.v. off and hide in a dark corner.

I remember watching the movie until just after the horses head was found in the bed. I was freaked out by that. I couldn't believe that they would actually kill a horse and cut its head off for a movie.

At sometime during the movie I fell asleep on the livingroom floor. In those days all television stations stopped programming at midnight. I woke up to the static of the t.v. I was so mad at myself for falling asleep and missing the ending of the movie.

As I got ready to turn the t.v. off and go to bed I heard some awful growling coming from the kitchen area. I lay there and listen. My heart started pounding and beating harder and harder. My breathing got real heavy and I did all I could to calm myself down I was so afraid that what ever it was would here me breathing and break in and come right for me.

I had visions of a bear tearing down the kitchen door and coming into the livingroom and tearing me apart then dragging me to the woods to devour my body. I was really getting myself worked up thinking about what a terrible death it was going to be for me. I was frozen with fear. The growling was so bad that I knew the bear could see me throw the window in the door. I remember thinking to myself I this is happening to me because I sneaked out here to watch that movie and then I fell asleep anyway.

My mind raced back and forth, what do I do? Do I sit here and scream my lungs out. Do I wait for the bear to break in and get me which may be better than my mother finding out that I disobeyed her and watched The Godfather? Should I go to the kitchen and get a butcher knife to defend myself? I was so scared I felt like sitting there and peeing myself.

All of a sudden the bear was not only growling ans snarling but now it was scraching madly at the door. That was it. I couldn't stand it anymore. I was so young but I was on my way to a grown-up size heart attack. I had no choice in the matter anymore. At anytime the bear would break in and there would be a bloody mess in the livingroom and I just knew my family would never get over the sight of the mess and besides I knew my mother would really be upset that she would have to spend all day the next day cleaning up the mess.

I decided I would risk my mothers rath over the vicious bears. I got up slowly, stood on my tip-toes and ran on tip-toes as fast as I could to my mother and stepfathers bedroom. I remember thinking as I was running dow the hallway how fast a person could move on tip-toes if they really had to. As soon as I got close enough to where I thought I was safe I started screaming. I threw open my parents bedroom door and screamed, "A BEAR IS TRYING TO BREAK IN, IT IS GROWLING AND SCRATHING AT THE DOOR." My mother and stepfather jumped out of bed and ran down the hall towards the kitchen. I was right behind them. My mother said, "There aren't any bears around here." I said, "Well I hear one trying to break in." When my parents got to the kitchen I decided not to go with them. I ran into the livingroom. I figured that if the bear broke through the kitchen door I would have time to get away while he mauled my mother and stepfather.

I saw the kitchen light go on and then I heard my mother call to me. I couldn't imagine why she would call me and want me to get that close to where the bear was. My heart started racing faster and faster as I walked towards the kitchen. When I got to the kitchen my mother said, "Is this what you heard?" I looked and there was my brother Little Jim sitting at the table with a huge bowl of Corn Flakes. He was scratching the bowl as he brought up a spoonful of cereal. As he ate he slurped and crunched and sounded like he was growling.

That was that. Little Jim was in trouble for getting up and eating (and scaring me) and I was in trouble for sneaking out of bed to watch the Godfather and then I was in trouble again for getting Little Jim in trouble. I stood a better chance with a bear than I did with Little Jim.

-- george nh (rcoopwalpole@aol.com), January 20, 2002

Answers

George!! can't wait for the book. your stories are outstanding. Makes my day!! congrats! Tomas in b.c.

-- Tomas (bakerzee@hotmail.com), January 20, 2002.

When my parents were first married in 1937, they lived in a tenthouse at Crater Lake National Park. Their job was to ski out to the park boundaries and several locations and measure snow depth. One day they came back and found a bear had broken into their tenthouse and gotten into the banana bread. My brother still has the teakettle with either teeth or claw marks on it. Later on, when I was six, we lived at park headquarters and one night a bear tried to get into our kitchen. He smelled fresh jam. Scared the peewodden out of me because he was in a tree just outside where my bed was and making a terrible racket. My dad scared it off, but I will never forget the sound of that bear trying to get in. Several families of us stayed in the park all winter and we kids were taught to signal if bears were around by banging on the garbage cans. Some of the bears wouldn't hibernate. In those days the bears hung around the dump all the time and I remember that one of our favorite things to do was to get in the car after supper and go to the dump and watch the bears. This really doesn't have much to do with anything, just stories from my childhood.

-- Dee (bdforce@theriver.com), January 20, 2002.

George, I don't know about this book deal now. I can just see once your book gets published and people buying it, there will be an epidemic of people just suddenly dying. "I don't know what happened to poor Uncle Jack, he was sitting in the chair reading this new book he got, started laughing and laughing, couldn't stop laughing and dropped over dead." The really bad thing is no one will get to the end of the book! Oh, you really have a talent. If you need an agent please sign up with me! You are going to be big, remember folks you heard from me first. Oh my, I'm still wiping my eyes. I haven't laughed so hard like this in a long time. Thanks George. And yes, I still want a signed copy of your book, even if it is going to kill me!

-- Michael W. Smith in North-West Pennsylvania (kirklbb@penn.com), January 20, 2002.