The club scene.

Every time you swear you've retired from it, the next pop craze demands all your attention. Dance floors, gay clubs, oxygen bars, drag, ecstasy and the rave scene, back to full circle. Straight clubs are chic once again.

That's where our hapless antihero finds himself on Thursday night. School is out for Fall Break, and the liquor, ecstasy, marijuana, and sex of a nearby city beckons. Into his car go 3 girls from class, and into another car go 4 more friendlies. Fake ID's in pocket, a dance with the beyond begins.

90 mph is the average speed. A 2 hour trip dissolves in 45 minutes. A quick stop, vodka shots all around. 4 rounds later, and we are ready to dance.

The bartender tells us her specialty is Sex on the Beach. I thank her for the offer, and choose instead to drink.

4 shots of tequila vanish, followed by 2 glasses of something deceptively fruity, and something that tastes like cinnamon mouthwash. Funny things happen when you've had one too many. You start to see things less as how they are, and more how you want them to be. The music moves from staccato hip-pop to industrial techno. The champagne glasses are left on the table, and the glowsticks appear from out of nowhere. True beauty is revealed. Every dance is like a game. You square dance to Bad Boy Bill's cadence and compete with the other dancers for supreme hypnotist.

Sarah is winning. I stand mesmerized and watch the strobe light make her move in slow motion. The machine gun overthump fades into the background as the half dozen different ingested chemicals kick into high gear. Is this love? Out to the parking lot to ask Dr. Pot what he thinks. Definitely perhaps.

The government would have you to believe that driving drunk is a dangerous endeavor. Impaired judgement, the such. People use "I was drunk" as the catch all, so hence, 90% of all auto accidents become alcohol related in a 10 year period. You have to know how to use those sensations. If you realize that your reaction time will be off, you open your eyes wider. If you realize that you will become slow and drowsy, you drink 40 oz. of Mountain Dew in 10 minutes. If you realize that the cops are looking for you to say something unintelligible, you shut your fucking mouth. Drunk. Not stupid.

105 is the average return speed. Not by choice, but because my car is lost, and the person I'm following has the last name of Andretti. Noone speaks. The driver may lose his concentration. The broken white lines are solid at this speed, and the mere twitch of a hand will send the car to Neverland. Fast. Are they afraid of the threat of dying, or amazed at the skill of the drivers? Noone will ask.

Familiar territory. Driver switch. This is where God gets in the car. You may never see God until you watch a beautiful 19 year old lesbian pilot your car at near maximum capacity as the drugs begin to wear off. You may never see God until you lose control through no fault of yours or the drivers. You may never see God until you realize that you've walked away from a high speed accident with 3 people unharmed, one with a dislocated shoulder, and no damage whatsoever to your automobile. You may never see God until you realize that he has a plan for you that does not involve you dying any time soon. You may never see God until you realize that he likes you.

I am the chosen one.

-- Anonymous, October 20, 2002

Answers

woh! sempai,did this actuly happen?if it did are you alright?i am so sorry.

-- Anonymous, October 20, 2002

Heeee I'm ok. A Fall Break to remember. Everyone's ok. Just changed a few of my perspectives. Never let anyone drive your car is my new saying. NEVER LET ANYONE DRIVE YOUR CAR! THAT'S THE...um...CAR!

-- Anonymous, October 20, 2002

Three words.
Holy. Fucking. Shit.

-- Anonymous, October 20, 2002

Drivin on xtc is fun, when the cops come and you have to do that test (wich i dunnno what it is called in english) they won't find shit, and they'l like you for being so friendly to them, and they will wish you a good night, and when they Drive away, you point at them and LAUGH YOUR FUCKING ASS OFF

-- Anonymous, October 21, 2002

Sobreity test is when they make you stand on one foot and shit. Breathalyzer test is when you blow into a BAC calculator. I've um...seen this all on TV.

Speaking of XTC, DZ, touch me there...oohhh good. Now blow on my forehead...mmm nice. Vapo-Rub? Please pass. I...am a glorious man. That's the macaroni and cheese!

-- Anonymous, October 21, 2002

yea, the breathhalyzer test, that's what I mean, they won't find xtc with it

-- Anonymous, October 21, 2002