Background on me:

Unfortunately when I was young, I got involved in the Jehovah's Witness cult, which in turn filled my head with some strange ideas about God, faith, and just about everything else. Long story short is that I was involved in the cult for about eight years (18-26, roughly). At the age of 22 I got married, then four years later I began to question their religion and later came to a clear understanding that they were "slightly" (note the sarcasm) off base about pretty much everything. Because of my questions, many so-called JW friends abandoned me. Topping it off is that my now ex-wife walked out on me, moved in with another man (thus committing fornication/adultery), divorced me and remarried (this happened in about nine months, but that is another story).

A handful of other important details: Before I was a JW, I was baptized as a Catholic and went through the various schooling that is available to a young one growing up. However, I never received my confirmation. Upon becoming a JW, there were a handful of mandatory "things" that were expected of me, in addition to knocking on doors, namely denouncing my former faith and being "re-baptized." Specifically, I was told to write a letter to the Catholic Church detailing my finding of this new "truth," as well as explaining my wish to no longer be considered a Catholic. The baptism to become a JW consisted of my entire body being submerged, which was complimented by a public declaration of my new faith.

It's been three years now since the separation and then divorice, since my removing myself--although not formally--from the JW religion. During these three years, and honestly during much of my early adult life while I was a JW, I've felt uneasy about my spirituality. And here I am now at 3:37 in the morning tapping at my computer.

Please help.

I need some guidance here. I need to know where to begin again--how do I get myself into that church door, both literally and figuratively. Can I ever be accepted into that door after I sent that dreadful letter? There is such a tightened ball in my chest right now that seems to pull tiny threads from the tips of my fingers and toes. I've dropped to my knees countless times and begged for help, begged for mercy, hoping and praying for something. To say the least, I messed up big time.

-- jimobrien (teacherguy2k@yahoo.com), July 23, 2004

Answers

bump

-- jr (foo@bar.com), July 23, 2004.

Jim,

Wow! Takes guts to walk that walk. Obviously you are drawn to the truthful voice of God. When you saw the inconsistancies among the JW, you decided to move on.

Don't worry even the slightest little bit about that letter you wrote. It has no effect to your always being a welcome member of the Church. Go to the Vatican website and take a gander at the Papal Encyclical by John Paul II entitled "The Splendor of the Truth." Its all about the parable of the prodigal son. That can be you if you decide to come home.

Nobody will be offended by your past deeds. We have all done things. But we will be very happy if you decide to come home. The door is wide open.

-- Pat Delaney (pat@patdelaney.net), July 23, 2004.

Dear Jim: Congratulations. The Gospel speaks about being more happiness in heaven for a single sinner repenting than for ninetynine saints. Be certain that you'll recieve a lot of good advice for many of our friends on this forum. Get in touch with the nearest Catholic Parish and surely they'll be glad to help you.

For the time being I offer you my sympathy and my prayers.

Enrique

-- Enrique Ortiz (eaortiz@yahoo.com), July 23, 2004.

Welcome Back Jim,

God sees your heart and I am sure is bubbling over with joy that you want to come back to worship Him. God is a merciful God who forgives, but you need to forgive yourself.

When you walk into church, you will not be walking in alone. You will have the Holy Spirit, Jesus, and a legion of angels to walk with you. Get your strength from that.

Don't worry about the letter. God's already ripped it up with his mercy. You may find healing in saying the Divine Mercy Chaplet. Got a rosary? It's said using rosary beads - but if you don't, then count on your fingers to improvise. It's a powerful prayer, most effectively recited at 3:00 daily, the time of Our Lord's death. It can be said anytime, however.

How to Recite the Chaplet of Divine Mercy:

Begin with the Our Father, the Hail Mary and the Apostle's Creed:

Our Father

Our Father, Who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy name; Thy kingdom come; Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread; and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us; and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil, Amen.

Hail Mary

Hail Mary, full of grace. The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death, Amen.

The Apostle's Creed

I believe in God, the Father Almighty, Creator of Heaven and earth; and in Jesus Christ, His only Son, Our Lord, Who was conceived by the Holy Ghost, born of the Virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified; died, and was buried. He descended into Hell; the third day He arose again from the dead; He ascended into Heaven, sitteth at the right hand of God, the Father Almighty; from thence He shall come to judge the living and the dead. I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy Catholic Church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body, and the life everlasting. Amen.

Then, on the large bead before each decade:

Eternal Father, I offer you the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Your Dearly Beloved Son, Our Lord, Jesus Christ, in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world.

On the ten small beads of each decade, say:

For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Conclude with (Say 3 Times):

Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

God Bless you Jim. We are proud of you and even better, He is pleased with your decision. See you at mass on Sunday.

Jennifer

-- Jennifer (jrabs@jrabs.com), July 23, 2004.

jim,

welcome back to the church, jim. several points for you:

1) your letter is irrelevant. it will not stand against you.

2) to get out of the JW's, you dont have to send them a nasty letter, or make any public declaration against them. all that is necessary is that you realize that you desire the fullness of truth and no longer wish to be a member of a man made church. your heart determines your loyalty, not a letter.

3) to get back into the swing of the catholic church... simply start going to mass again. you were baptized catholic. your second baptism is a rememberance of your first, not an individual baptism, as you can only be reborn into the life of Christ once. you are, jim, baptised catholic and always will be. now, heres an important part: go to confession. discuss these issues with a priest, and note that you have not attended mass in a long time. recieve your penance and be cleaned by the Holy Spirit in the Blood of our Savior. talk to your priest about joining RCIA classes to take your first Holy Communion and get confirmed to the faith. you didnt step backwards jim, you pick up where you left off in your growth.

4) make new friends. i know how it feels to have your jw friends run out on you. i used to have to attend protestant church with my mom, and others would start conversations and be friendly until they learned i was catholic and not ever going to change that. your friends can be of all faiths, but make sure they accept you for who you are, not simply because you happen to say the same words as them.

5) Pray, pray, and pray some more. talk with your priest, talk with an appologist, talk with the RCIA instructors. learn your faith. catholics who leave the church often share one common factor: they hardly knew enough about their own faith to even be considered catholic. in the churches vast complexity you will find a beautiful simplicity lying underneath it all.

God Bless Jim, it is always great to hear when someone returns to the faith.

-- paul h (dontsendmemail@notanaddress.com), July 23, 2004.

Dear Jim,

Thank you for sharing your story. It's very beautiful and makes me remember some of my own travails. Don't worry, it's in the past and you might soon forget it as I do.

paul h has some great advice. I would suggest speaking with a priest then going to confession. Face-to-face is the best in this case IMHO because it really lets the warmth flow through. After an earnest confession to a priest, which is basically what you just done, you may be able to receive the Blessed Sacrament since you were never confirmed. Also, attend RCIA and be confirmed - probably not until next Easter. Please, do share what you shared here again at RCIA. It is a most joyous thing to hear and appreciate and will allow the healing to go deep, I am sure of it. You have a great promise of hope.

May you prosper in faith and love!

-- Vincent (love@noemail.net), July 23, 2004.

Hi Jim, Glad to see so many friends of this forum advising you so very caringly. Welcome. You are on the right path in the catholic church.May Our Lord and Our Blessed mother guard and guide you and the Holy Spirit enlighten you Amen. God bless, Ramanie.

-- Ramanie Weerasinghe (lilan@yahoo.com), July 24, 2004.

I suppose the other night was a crisis of conscience, although a welcomed one. Thankfully I stumbled onto the board and am on my way to a better, more spiritual life.

Thank you, of course, for you responses, as each encouraged and informed me in various ways. I will keep you informed.

-- jimobrien (teacherguy2k@yahoo.com), July 24, 2004.

Jim,

My oops. We all screw up in different ways. What's important is to acknowledge your error and correct yourself.

In this case I misquoted. Veritatis Splendor is about the Rich Young Man and not the Prodigal Son. I kind of wish somebody here would point out the JPII writing incorporating the Prodigal Son parable.

-- Pat Delaney (pat@patdelaney.net), July 26, 2004.