Can somebody who is not married feel the calling to the diaconate? I know that the calling to the diaconate and a calling to the priesthood are similiar because they both involve a desire to be close to the altar and to the sacraments, an openness to sacrifice certain things for the sake of service to the Church family, and a deep love to offer oneself as a gift to God. But I'm also thinking that even though both vocations are similiar, they are also distinct.

I guess my question is this.

As a young unmarried man in his twenties, with a steady job and a serious girlfriend, might I be experiencing a calling to the diaconate now? Even though in my diocese I may not be ordained untill I'm 35? I just don't know. I love being active in my parish, but sometimes I feel like I would love to be a deacon. Even my girlfriend of a year says that I would be a good deacon. I've only spoken about it with my girlfriend and my best friend, but sometimes I wonder if God only calls men who are married?

Anyway, I'll stop rambling.

Andy

-- Andrew (Andrew1234@1234.com), September 20, 2004

Answers

Hello Andy,

Why not? Certainly God can be preparing you now for a wonderful vocation which will only unfold later in your life. Be open to His call, be faithful in worship, sacraments and prayer, and read the sacred scriptures. The Lord will make it clear to you over time, and brothers and sisters in Christ will probably see this in you also. When you draw nearer to age 35, visit your diocesan vocations director or talk to your priest for advice. By the way, maybe you will be married some day. Just make sure it is to a prayerful and loving Catholic woman who is open to your vocation. Christ be with you, dear brother!

Cordially,

-- Michael (edwardsronning@prodigy.net), September 20, 2004.

Certainly not. A married man may become a deacon, but so can a single man. The majority of deacons I know are married but I also know several single ones. Of course a single man, before entering the diaconate, must be willing to accept that he will never marry, for marriage is not possible after ordination, except for occasional dispensations in unusual circumstances. But this requirement is no different than for single men entering the priesthood.

-- Paul M. (PaulCyp@cox.net), September 20, 2004.

Paul! I did not know that! Wow, a single man may become a deacon? I know of two deacons who have retired from their careers and who's wives have passed away, but I didn't know that one might be called to the celibate diaconate. I wonder, is the age limit different for young men who feel called to the celibate diaconate? I imagine they would have to take a vow of obediance to a bishop, but do they have a little more freedom in choosing a career and choosing the parish to which they'd serve? Would the bishop ask them to live within a certain parish or would they be allowed to live a single life, pursuing the career of their choice and choose wherever they want to live?

I strongly feel a calling to the married life, but I'm intrigued with the life of a celibate deacon.

In Christ,

Andy

-- Andrew (Andrew1234@1234.com), September 21, 2004.

Deacons, married or unmarried, typically work full time in the career of their choice, serving the Church in a part-time capacity until retirement from their chosen profession. Some of course may have full time positions in the diocese. After retirement they may serve full time, or at least take on additional church-related commitments and responsibilities. A married deacon whose wife has died is bound to celibacy just like an unmarried deacon. He may not remarry. Occasionally a dispensation is granted for a deacon with small children who require the care of a mother. There is no difference in the age requirement for married and unmarried deacons. In most dioceses deacons are assigned to their own home parishes; however, the bishop does have the right to assign clergy as needs dictate, so in the event that there are several deacons in one parish and none in another parish, the bishop might reassign a deacon to a different parish.

-- Paul M. (PaulCyp@cox.net), September 21, 2004.

Response to Vocation to the deaconate at 23?

Dear Deacon Paul

This may be a local situation regarding the age 35, because if we look at the norms for the formation of deacons, it only mentions that married men must be of a more mature age:

The second Vatican Council established that “it will be possible for the future to restore the diaconate as a proper and permanent rank of the hierarchy....(and confer it) even upon married men, provided they be of more mature age, and also on suitable young men for whom, however, the law of celibacy must remain in force”,(21) in accordance with constant tradition.

Again if we look to canon law:

Can. 236 Those who aspire to the permanent diaconate are to be formed in the spiritual life and appropriately instructed in the fulfillment of the duties proper to that order, in accordance with the provisions made by the Episcopal Conference: 1° young men are to reside for at least three years in a special house unless the diocesan Bishop for grave reasons decides otherwise, 2° men of more mature years, whether celibate or married, are to prepare for three years in a manner determined by the same Episcopal Conference.

Hugh

-- Hugh (hugh@inspired.com), September 22, 2004.

Response to Vocation to the deaconate at 23?

Yes, the Council provided general guidelines, subject to specific implementation by the bishops of various regions. I don't know that 35 is the minimum age worldwide, and I am not even certain that it is the uniform requirement in every diocese of the United States, but it is the rule in every U.S. diocese I have had any contact with. Incidentally, the maximum age for acceptance into the diaconate program is 62.

-- Paul M. (PaulCyp@cox.net), September 22, 2004.