My fiance is Catholic and lives in a forien County. I recently received an anulment and I am free to Marry. The problem is knowing how to proceed with a Catholic marriage in less than 30 days. I will only be able to visit my fiance for 20 days in her country. I may be able to visit again in 3 months but once again it will only be for less than 30 days. Once I visit I can apply for a fiance visa for her to marry me in the US. Once she comes to the US she will have 90 days to marry me. Most parishes require 4 to six months before marriage. We are left with the painful choice of civil marriage or no marriage at all. She understands that if we marry in a civil court that neither one of us will be able to receive communion. Of course after we marry we will in essance be living like brother and sister since it will be 3 to 12 months before we can be togeather after the civil marriage. So on one hand we could go to confession and receive sacrements while not living togeather (I think). But the original sin of marring outside the church and knowing the consiquences is the real issue here and subject of concern.

-- Philip Studler (studlerphs@hotmail.com), January 16, 2005

Answers

>"We are left with the painful choice of civil marriage or no marriage at all."

Actually Philip, that is not really a choice, since civil "marriage" for a Catholic IS in fact no marriage at all. I really don't understand the problem. If you are not going to be able to live as a married couple for a number of months anyway, what purpose would be served by going through a meaningless parody of marriage before the months of separation? Why can't you schedule the wedding so that the end of the 4 to 6 months notice required by the Church falls within the 90 day period covered by the visa?

-- Paul M. (PaulCyp@cox.net), January 16, 2005.

Have you considered getting married by proxy - someone stands in for you or your intended spouse for the ceremony?

The six months notice is not written in stone, go see your priest or bishop.

-- Fr. Paul (pjdoucet@hotmail.com), February 13, 2005.

BTW - Civil marriage is not a sin, living as if married when you are not (according to Divine Law) is.

-- Fr. Paul (pjdoucet@hotmail.com), February 13, 2005.

> "Civil marriage is not a sin, living as if married when you are not (according to Divine Law) is."

So, to clarify ... therefore, a Catholic living as if married after going through a civil "marriage" is living in sin. Correct?

-- Paul M. (PaulCyp@cox.net), February 13, 2005.

"So, to clarify ... therefore, a Catholic living as if married after going through a civil "marriage" is living in sin. Correct?"

Correct.

It sounds as if the civil marriage in this case has to do with some civil advantage of some kind. If they do not engage in sexual acts, then they are not sinning.

In the eyes of the Church they are not attempting marriage (meaning they are not trying to pass themselves off as married in the eyes of the Church or saying they don't care about the Church's requirements), but seeking some civil advantage. They know full well that it is not a valid marriage and thus are committed to live according to this truth.

Canon 1127 §3 while forbidding (which does not invalidate a marriage) "another RELIGIOUS celebration of the same marriage for the purpose of giving or renewing matrimonial consent" (emphasis added), does not mention a civil celebration. In fact, in most cases it is simply that the civil ceremony takes place at the exact same moment as the canonical one whereas in most jurisdictions priests, etc. must also have a civil permit to perform marriages. It is, however, common in some jurisdictions for the civil and the canonical ceremonies to be separate (this is becoming the norm in parts of Europe).

-- Fr. Paul (pjdoucet@hotmail.com), February 14, 2005.